A Fan of the Game

Sports Talk, Straight Talk

Been a LONG time

Ray here–

I put the blog on the backburner after last football season and posted some Collegiate Times articles I wrote. A few things I do want to talk about lately, though.  Shawne Merriman, volleyball, Kenny Chesney and the inept Virginia Tech offense.

Merriman– Bill Cosby once talked about brain damage in his performance “Himself,” in 1983. The brain damage he spoke of was when children need to hear things three times or more to understand. Even then, they will disobey and when you ask why, they reply, “I don’t know!” Here’s a link to a youtube video with the excerpt.

Shawne must not understand what it means to be a good citizen or even a competent one. Stay out of trouble, even if the person accusing you of battery is a whacko named Tila Tequila.

Volleyball– What a pleasant surprise this has been! I got the women’s volleyball beat for the Collegiate Times this semester. I’ll admit I was a bit skeptical of what to expect, but it’s been awesome. The night I found out, I spent three hours researching the rules and watching youtube videos on how to play.

I’m still getting a grip on the abstract rules and how to calculate all the statstics, but watching the games is very exciting. The players can be a bit nervous when I interview them, but I think they will break out of their shell.

One player on the team doesn’t like interviews, and she is deemed off-limits to me. I wonder if she had a bad experience with any previous writers of any kind. She’s a good player too, so it sucks I can’t talk to her.

The team is 6-0 right now, and they are in Washington, D.C. for a tournament this weekend. I think they can win all three games handily if they do well. It is their first road test, so who knows what might happen.

Kenny Chesney– Please. For the life of me I don’t understand why ESPN chooses such crappy theme songs for college football. Chesney and Dave Matthews?! I didn’t know ESPN is a proponent of homoeroticism.

Watching the Georgia Tech-Clemson game tonight, they had another country singer, and I believe he is the “ACC singer.” God help us. How is some dude in a cowboy hat and tank top supposed to get us pumped for a violent, head-smashing sport? I’ve googled the topic and found about a 99% disapproval rate. The other 1% are girls who just say “I love Kenny!” or guys who pop their collars that love Dave Matthews. Disgusting.

The inept VT offense– Oh. My. God. How retarded is our offense? Oh wait, it’s not the offense who is retarded. It’s offensive coordinator Bryan Stinespring. There are “Fire Bryan Stinespring” websites and blogs everywhere, and it’s hilarious. (http://firebryanstinespring.blogspot.com/)

The consensus says he still has a job because he and Frank Beamer are close friends. Well, good gracious, wake up Frank! You have had talented NFL receivers on the team in the past (Josh Morgan, David Clowney, Eddie Royal), and now you have Ryan Williams and Tyrod Taylor. You still can’t muster 100 yards in a ferrari. You would probably sabotage the engine. Fire this quack and get him out of the program.

Fire Bryan Stinespring shirt

Fire Bryan Stinespring shirt

I’d really like to get the chance to ask Frank straight up, “Are you satisfied with ACC Championships or do you want more?” We barely win the ACC as it is with Bryan’s pathetic offense, anyway. This is why you don’t hire your friends as coworkers. We might have to get shutout the rest of the season in order for Frank to notice something’s wrong.

September 11, 2009 Posted by | Football, Other, Volleyball | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What the Hell Were We Thinking (Week 3, Nathan)… and the Ryder Cup Recap!

Dallas 27 Green Bay 16

So, for the first time ever the Dallas Cowboys beat the Green Bay Packers at Lambeau Field. It’s upsetting but somewhat expected. Mason Crosby, the best kicker in the game right now (especially since he is on my fantasy team.. sorry Ray) had 3 good field goals which helped me win my match-up in fantasy. I love when kickers can contribute to a winning team. (I am going to leave Tony Romo and Terrell “I’m a baby” Owens out of this blog. Thats because they are simply talked about too much. Until they win a Super Bowl, until they prove themselves worthy of my time, you won’t hear me say a word about them after this… ) The Packers are still the best team in the NFC North and will be back in the playoffs once again. Go get ’em boys!!!

Minnesota 20 Carolina 10

Wow! The Minnesota Vikings actually won a game. I guess Gus Frerotte can still lead a team to victory. The Panthers had won both games this season in the fourth quarter. Well, the Vikings did not even give them a chance to do that again. The Vikings looked like a good team. If this keeps up, they have a chance of challenging the Packers for the division.

Jacksonville 23 Indianapolis 21

A new stadium… Peyton Manning… and a Sunday Afternoon. What do you usually get? Usually its a Indianapolis Colts victory. But not this season. So far in the new stadium, they are 0-2 and have yet to take advantage of Tom Brady’s injury. They were supposed to be the second best team in the AFC and when Brady went down, that shot them straight up to the top of the League. Well so far, it looks like they need to go back to their old stomping grounds. Baltimore! Just kidding.

Miami 38 New England 13

For the first time in over a year, the New England Patriots have lost a regular season game. Joey Porter of the Miami Dolphins talked the talk, and he definitely walked the walk. The Patriots looked like they had no clue what they were doing out on the field. Matt Cassel spent more time on his back than a cheap hooker. (no offense… and no hate mail from ‘the corner’). Bill Parcells has made the Dolphins into a good team; not quite great but a good team. It was actually fun watching the Dolphins for the first time in a long time.

And now onto the most exciting thing that happened this weekend:

RYDER CUP RECAP

In Kentucky, Kenny Perry and the United States Ryder Cup Team brought home the trophy. For the first time in years, the Men beat the Boys from across the pond, in the 37th Ryder Cup.

While watching the Ryder Cup, I almost felt like I was watching a hockey game. The fans were chanting, the crowds were loud, and it was a blast to watch. When Jim Furyk’s championship clinching putt was conceded, I could not help but chant “USA, USA, USA!!!!!.”

While Phil Mickelson choked once again, Anthony Kim and Boo Weekly dazzled us Americans. The best part of this weekend was to see Paul Azinger, the captain of the American’s, riding around on his golf course doing “victory laps” and the fans chanting “BOO!!!!” after each and every amazing shot by fellow American, Boo Weekly. It was good to see the men having fun and celebrating a victory.

-Nathan

September 23, 2008 Posted by | Football, Golf | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment